Signs and Wonders

Ever since I learned to read as a child, I've always noticed signs. Most advertise a business name or a location; others, a special event. Still more of them offer us direction: 'merge left', or 'line forms here'. A select few strike me as funny, and the rest just make me wonder...

Though I've seen many humorous signs over the past 36 years, there have been more that I absolutely love here in rural Mississippi than any place else on earth.

Some of my favorites are a tribute to rural practicality. When you live in a town of 3,000, there isn't enough business to support one store for work clothes and one for tuxedo rentals; they are conveniently found under the same roof! Up North, though, you'd never see these two signs by the same front door:

Of necessity, country folks are experts at multitasking. It isn't uncommon for one person to run more than one small business, or to run one small business with many facets.

'Diversification' may be a big buzz word in Corporate America, but I've yet to see anything quite as diverse as this one:

The Parker Clan pretty much covers one big hill nearby, and they grow a lot of pecans. They also buy scrap metal of all kinds, which comes in especially handy when cleaning up after a hurricane. I don't know of too many hunters these days who sell pelts, but I suppose there's a need. I just can't imagine any three more unrelated objects than pecans, scrap metal, and fur! (Fishing lures, concrete, and lingerie, perhaps?) I giggle every time I pass by.

The Oldenbetters' line of business is antique car restoration. I guess the name is proof that some things do improve with age!

I keep waiting for someone to build another garage on the lot next door and open up shop installing panel-rattling vehicle sound systems for the 20-something crowd. They could call the place "Youngenlouder"...but I don't see that happening.

You see, next door to Oldenbetters' is a bar with a very large sign out front stating "Hunters Welcome". (Translation: If you smell bad after 3 days in the woods and gutting a deer, we don't mind.). Now, around here, hunters--when they're not in the woods--listen to country or classic rock, and none of them would mind leveling a 12-gauge at any mega-woofers driving by. I guess the Oldenbetters will keep turning out classics in relative peace.

This may be the Buckle of the Bible Belt, but it's also the home of Rebel Pride. The two cultural movements combine to provide a unique ministry: The Biker Church ("for bikers and those who love them"). This is not a motorcycle club; it is a non-denominational church. The childrens' Christian education program is called "Trikers' Church", and there are Fellowship Rides after every service. Most unique!